Mature men and women are givers. Immature people are takers.
Mature people seek to give value, where as immature people are looking what to take and gain.
For men, it is difference between boy and man psychology. For women, between girl and a woman psychology.
In the book series King, Warrior, Magician & Lover, Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette focus more on the mature masculine psychology and how that happens i.e. how a boy dies and becomes a man. Traditionally it has been through rituals in the guidance of elder wise men acquainted with the sufficient knowledge. Writers also point out that most modern societies have transformed many of these rituals into mere impotent ceremonies, which do not have sufficient energy to make the transition.
As example they use a scene described from the movie Emerald Forest where a boy dies during the ritual in the deep jungle and when the sun rises, is born anew as a man.
In the book series also work with the shadow forms are emphasized before starting deeper work. Each archetype has two shadows. So a hero boy could be a bully or a coward, which is then further transformed into a mature warrior archetype which has also it’s shadows the sadist and the masochist.
I’ve found the framework inspiring for my personal development and growth. Through my life I’ve been able to recognize moments where the thoughts, words/lines or actions have actually been categorized as shadow work versus being fully mature. These are exceptionally educative moments.
Sometimes shadow do take us over, and when that happens we have to be ready. Shadows are part of us, and in a healthy mind they become part of the whole. “Not too much, not too little.”
Healthy psychology and healthy giving is like that as well. When we give too much we make people weak. When we take too much, we become weak.
Giving should also be focused on more lasting giving.
When eating a fruit, how often do you thank the person who planted or nurtured the fruit tree? Or picked that fruit up?
Nature contains many blessings even without us. I live in Finland and Finnish forests are abundant of various berries during summertime. Having lived in countryside for my childhood, I’ve learned to respect everything in the nature. Few days ago I realized that I could be doing still much better work in my present life and condition and I should. Let this be my lesson and decision to start contributing more towards the nature from this day onwards.
What are value you going to give and how?